It was a weekend to forget for this technophobe

I CAN'T say I'm a huge fan of technology, and the weekend has just confirmed that.

I admit I'm old school when it comes to these sorts of things, to the point of when using a phone, I talk to someone, not text, and to being old enough to remember what a telex machine was (and how crap it was at the same time).

Over the weekend I had an issue with my mobile.

When I say 'an issue' what I really mean is that it had a mix-up with some water.

Now please don't think it fell into the toilet. It didn't. In fact, it fell into the sink while I was doing the dishes (yes, I do domestic chores too. I'll make a good husband one day).

What actually happened was, as I was cleaning the tubs of chocolate from the world's best cake I made, I was talking on the phone at the same time.

When I jumped up to fist pump the air after watching the Roosters score yet another try on TV, I lost control of the phone and it fell into the suds.

I did what any normal person would do in these circumstances - I rinsed it out, dropped it in a tub full of rice and left it.

Four hours later I returned, and to my amazement it was stuffed. I then proceeded to smash it on the driveway outside, to my neighbour's horror, and then drove into town to buy another phone. Simple.

What made me hate technology even more over the weekend were the problems I was having with a few of my new technical gadgets.

I recently bought an Apple TV which allows me to play music from anywhere in the house. That died.

I tried to back up my old iPod and that didn't work, displaying some corrupt message on the screen, so that was a waste of time.

The other event that threw me was when I went to wash my massive car, and after doing it the car headlights stopped working and the hazard lights wouldn't turn off.

Joy, I thought as I drove into town on the first of my days off. The police are going to see me and wonder what the heck is going on.

What I'm doing now is looking for a mechanic who can fix headlights, hazard lights, iPods, TVs, rice buckets and chocolate cakes.

If you know of anyone, please write to me. I can't work the new phone.

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