I WAS with it once, or at least I was with it. Whatever it was, I was down like a clown and it was on like Donkey Kong. These days, however, not so much.
I recently had that terrifying yet liberating experience where I simply could not comprehend the latest trend.
Those of you above the age of 25 will be sagely nodding your heads by now, but those of you under 25 will more than likely be proclaiming "Whatevs. YOLO!" (Either ironically or un-ironically).
Even if I didn't necessarily agree with the trend or find the latest meme hilarious, I could at least understand it and know why it could possibly be funny.
However, lately I've been forced to confront the reality that I'm simply not with it and probably won't be for the rest of my life.
In the words of old man Simpson: "I used to be with it. But then they changed what it was. Now what I'm with isn't it, and what's it seems weird and scary to me... and it'll happen to you".
It, ladies and gentlemen, has certainly changed.
Now I find what is it weird and scary, but that's totally okay.
At the tender age of 26 I've come to the conclusion that I can basically start ignoring whatever the kids are into these days, and it's awfully liberating.
Once where ironic Facebook hash-tagging was my game, now eating a muffin and listening to Miles Davis on a Saturday morning is my bag.
I can't even get annoyed at the inanity of the latest trend because I know it really doesn't affect me in the slightest.
And to those young'uns who think there's something wrong with eating a muffin and listening to jazz in the morning instead of nursing a hangover from an epic night out, let me inform you of something:
If you don't like sitting comfortably and listening to jazz while eating a muffin, there's something wrong with you.
I find now that age is simply having the wisdom to ignore the hipster nonsense of the younger generation.
I'll leave the YOLOs, ROFLs and LMAOs to the kids, and just sit here content with my muffin and feel Kind of Blue (it's a good thing). That may not be cool, but it's definitely hip and most perfectly square.