A Police-Speak to English translation guide
THERE'S a demanding level of translation required to understand media statements that come out of the Queensland Police Service.
So how can you suck the most marrow from the bones thrown to you by our blue-draped masters? Follow this simple guide to what they're really saying.
Anything from a dented car to Indonesia invading.
We don't pay our lawyers nearly enough to give you a solid answer.
What we call it when the bad guys promise to bash someone's mum.
Injuries that don't magically disappear.
Complied with demands
Didn't go into a meth-induced fit.
Anything up to cuts and bruises.
Injuries we really shouldn't be making fun of.
There's most likely a charity dedicated to this kind of thing.
There's a promotion here if we can find someone to blame.
Attempted to avoid police
Dangerous operation of a vehicle
Anything from braking too quickly to building a bomb with it.
Failure to appear in accordance with undertaking
Didn't rock up to court.
Forensic Crash Unit
Used when the media are going to ask questions.
Ethical Standards Command will oversee the investigation
We may have done the wrong thing but we're not quite sure yet.
Police would like to speak with
Police would like to arrest.
Is helping police with investigations
Wink, wink, nudge, nudge
Person of interest
The one we're hoping to arrest
See Person of interest
Comes before helping police with investigations
Random Traffic Stop
Police officers are now targeting ...
The officer operated within guidelines
The officer was videotaped being a bit rough