Making a hate list a sure sign your relationship is doomed
TINA hated when Jason drank coffee. It wasn't the fact that he drank coffee - rather, the way he drank.
He refused to tilt the cup.
So, when he took sips, he would make long, irritating slurping noises that could be heard over the loudest of movies.
Tonight it was particularly frustrating and as she stared at him, she made mental lists in her mind of all the things she hated about the man she once loved so much.
The relationship was suffocating her.
Just before relationships end, we discover negatives about our partners and forget about all the positives.
Why didn't we notice them before?
Some people say love is blind. That the negatives are there all along but we fail to see.
I believe a relationship ends long before the words are spoken.
We make mental hate lists, so it is easier for us to make the transition from having that special someone to being single.
We become petty in our scrutiny, to ease the pain of loss.
It is never easy leaving a relationship, because we are not just letting go of a person. We are letting go of hopes, of what could have been.
Our hate list confirms to us that this is not the partner we are hoping for. We all have our ways of moving on.
Making your hate list may seem to make it easier in the short term, but wasting energy on hating things your partner does will just fill your life with anger.
By Tina making a hate list about her partner, it may not necessarily mean the end - but it is a good sign her relationship is in trouble.
No partner is perfect, but if find you are actively making a hate list, you are better off deciding if you want to continue.
Do it before you end up hating your partner so much that there is no possibility of a smooth break-up or burying them in the backyard.
Got a relationship question? Email firstname.lastname@example.org.